havadan sudan [blog, writing, travel, yoga]

I want to sell some of my memories… Is there anybody who would like to
buy those? Don’t worry I am not selling any of the bad ones…I assure
you only good ones… Ok, I do understand the question. Why am I selling
if they are such good? Because I am bored of them. It is like to sell
your beloved clothes to the second-hand shop on the corner. Because you
need space for new ones. I don’t like to be a collector so I really need
to get rid of those memories…

Resolutions are really good. They
help us to stay sane. It doesn’t matter whether we are able to keep all
or not. Every new year eve brings people heaps of resolutions. Some
people even believe that the way how they start the new year is very
important because they are going to have the same stuff all during the
year. That’s completely insane. Where is the will and desire to change
something or one’s self?

There is always the conflict of reason and
emotion in front of human beings. Today is the first day of the year and I
still have a hang over. Does it mean that I will spend the year with
hang overs? There is more important stuff like the battle between the
good will and the inertia and apathy. I wanna change…I can…but in
the end I didn’t…

It was New Year’s Eve in Berlin last night…2007
just started…People were dancing in the mud last night… Does it
help to make the coming year better?
Sometimes you can’t find the answer just because you asked the wrong question:
Do
you feel like changing your life this year??? I am planning to start
changing by selling some of my memories if I can find anyone who is willing to
buy them…

Bu yazı, ilk defa 2/1/2007 tarihinde havadansudan.azbuz.com’da yayınlandı.

Kibrit Çakıyorsun Karanlıkta

Kibrit çakıyorsun karanlıkta
badem çiçeklerini görmek için
Ve mart denizlerinde tedirgin bir çift
sarnıç gemisi gözlerin
Bir iş açacaksın sen başımıza
yangın mı olur artık, bahar mı?

Can Yücel

Bahar geliyor… Önce içimize mi yoksa sokağın iki yanındaki ağaçlara mı? Duygularımız hareketlenmeye başlıyor… Belki de yüzümüze bir gülümseme konuyor. Heyecanlıyız biz… Bahar tekrar buluşma demek, uyanma, canlanma demek… Berlin, baharı sessiz sakin karşılıyor bu yıl… Kutlamaların iptal edildiğini öğreniyoruz, içimiz buruluyor…

Bu yazı, ilk defa 13/3/2007 tarihinde havadansudan.azbuz.com’da yayınlandı.

Renowned playwright George Bernard Shaw once said “The reasonable man adapts himself to the world, the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.” So what did the human beings do for ages? Were they reasonable? There are heaps of questions flying in my brain? Like Gauguin, I ask myself: Where do we come from? What are we? Where are we going?

The delusion of progress is like a pill for all of us today. We love to talk about it. It gives us self-confidence, it helps us to grow our egos more and more. As we get older, we like to put that in words as we get wiser. It is kind of a personal progress, isn’t it? How about the progress of the human being? Did it help anyone to change the world? I wanna change the world… Because I don’t want to change myself…Moreover I don’t want to pay any effort to live the game according to the rules of the nature…

Many of the beautiful things we don’t have today are lost thanks to our great(!) civilisation. Starting from Easter Island’s monolithic wilderness to Wilhelm Golding’s “the God of Flies” we never ever wanted to confess how wild and how destructive we were and still the same story is going on and affecting more people. There is a growing ozone hole, who cares? There is the drastic climate change, who cares? There are millions of people dying only due to unfair wealth distribution, who cares? Animals and plants extinct, who cares?

What do we; the human beings care of? First of all money… Secondly, an image of a paradise: so to say religion… We love to own things… We love to own money, material things, houses, cars, clothes, sometimes even animals and most of the time our wives, husbands, girlfriends, children… We love to control everything but can we control the nature? We can control many things: stock markets, money markets, any kind of markets…

I want to give up now… I don’t want any kind of progress if it deteriorates the nature, the world and the lives of unborn generations… I remind myself that the journey finishes exactly where it starts…

Bu yazı, ilk defa 30/1/2008 tarihinde havadansudan.azbuz.com’da yayınlandı.

I still remember the famous sentence of Al Pacino in the movie Devil’s Advocate: ” Vanity is definitely my favorite sin”. Pride and vanity are quite different things. Pride relates more to our opinion of ourselves, on the other hand vanity to what we would have others think of us. Which is good? to what extend is open to debate…

It was the 1800s of England. There was a woman called Jane Austen was writing fabulously. I am sure that people talked a lot about Miss Elizabeth Benet and Mr. Darcy in the last two hundred years. Probably, a lot of people admire them. Even we have met Mr. Darcy in Briget Jones Diary two times already.

I keep asking to myself: What drives people more? vanity or pride? Let’s say someone tells something bad about you directly or indirectly. Would you try to do something against it? Would you try to correct or change the people’s idea of you by having the fear that this offense changed the way they think of you?

How would be the love story of Jane and Mr. Bingley or Lizzy and Mr. Dary if they lived today? Probably, they would aware of each others feelings earlier but wouldn’t mind much. Jane would send an sms to Mr. Bingley to say she was on the way to London. They would meet for a drink in a nice London bar or maybe they would go to a club together on Saturday night. I am sure Lizzy would write emails to tell what happened in the mean time instead of writing such long letters.

Would men care of a woman’s fortune before deciding to marry her? Bank accounts would not be as transparent as in the times of Austen. But there are many unchanged things. People still do care of money as in the past. They are still competing with each other. They still like to think of themselves as the most happiest couple in the world at the beginning… Do you think whether “happily lived forever” exists? or has ever existed?

Bu yazı, ilk defa 07/12/2006 tarihinde havadansudan.azbuz.com’da yayınlandı.